Subject: funny
>
For all of us who feel only the deepest love
> and affection for
the way computers have enhanced our lives, read
on.
>
>
>
At a recent computer expo (COMDEX),Bill
> Gates reportedly
compared the computer industry with the auto industry and
>
stated,
>
>
'If GM had kept up with technology like the
> computer industry
has, we would all be driving $25 cars that got 1,000
>
miles
> to the
gallon.'
>
>
In response to Bill's comments, General
> Motors issued a press
release
stating:
>
>
If GM had developed technology like
> Microsoft, we would all be
driving cars with the following characteristics
> (and I just love
this part
):
>
>
1. For no reason whatsoever, your car would
>
crash.... Twice a
day.
>
>
2. Every time they repainted the lines in
> the road, you would
have to buy a new
car.
>
>
3. Occasionally your car would die on the
> freeway for no reason.
You would have to pull to the side of the road,
> close
>
all of the windows, shut off the car, restart it, and reopen the
windows
> before you could continue. For some reason you would
simply accept
this.
>
>
4. Occasionally, executing a maneuver such
> as a left turn would
cause your car to shut down and refuse to restart, in
> which case
you would have to reinstall the
engine.
>
>
5. Macintosh would make a car that was
> powered by the sun, was
reliable, five times as fast and twice as easy to
> drive - but
would run on only five percent of the
roads.
>
>
6. The oil, water temperature, and
> alternator warning lights
would all be replaced by a single 'This Car Has
> Performed An
Illegal Operation' warning
light.
>
>
I love the next one
!!!
>
>
7. The airbag system would ask 'Are you
> sure?' before
deploying.
>
>
8. Occasionally, for no reason whatsoever,
> your car would lock
you out and refuse to let you in until you
> simultaneously lifted
the door handle, turned the key and grabbed hold of
> the radio
antenna.
>
>
9. Every time a new car was introduced car
> buyers would have to
learn how to drive all over again because none of the
> controls
would operate in the same manner as the old
car.
>
>
10. You'd have to press the 'Start' button
> to turn
the engine
off!
>
>
PS - I'd like to add that when all else
> fails, you could call
'customer service' in some foreign country and be
> instructed in
some foreign language how to fix your car yourself
!!!!
>
>
Please share this with your friends who
> love - but sometimes
hate - their
computer!